I'm writing under a pseudonym to respect my loved ones who prefer I not reveal details of their lives. Personally, I do not mind sharing the details of my life. However, I'm a recovering gossip and try to be ever mindful of other people's boundaries. I learned this lesson painfully starting with this event.
About seven years ago, my youngest son Samson and his girlfriend Callie (both adults) were living with me. My older son's girlfriend Joanna showed up unexpectedly to visit. I was home alone, so I invited her in, offered her a drink and sat down on the couch to chit-chat with her. We started off talking about her frustrations with my son Fergus. We talked about her hopes for the future. I'm sure I gave her a lot of really great advice. Or not. I'm not certain why but I began sharing with her my hopes and fears for the future of my younger son and his girlfriend. Everything I said was motivated by a mother's love. At least that's what I believed at the time.
The next morning, Samson told me they needed to talk to me. He told me they had been in their room the night before and heard the entire conversation between myself and Joanna. He was hurt and disappointed. My heart sank. My face became hot from shame. I apologized to my son and his girlfriend but the damage was already done. I was confused about my behavior, my intentions, and the results. I'm still trying to earn back his trust.
Everything I'll be writing about is true. The names of all participants will be changed to protect the privacy of the other people involved in my life.
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